Bleach: House Built on Sand
by Anger House
Summary: Sequel to BLEACH: A Line in the Sand [shonenai]
1. Misery

**BLEACH: HOUSE BUILT ON SAND, SEQUEL TO A LINE IN THE SAND**

He knelt with his legs neatly tucked under him. His eyes ached with dryness and grew redder with each night he failed to sleep. From under heavy lids, his dark eyes followed the pacing, blonde exile. "Ichigo," the man mumbled, turning his shadow-casted eyes onto the tired boy. "Your cause is admirable but-"

"Urahara," a roughened voice echoed from behind Ichigo. The boy turned and fixed his weary gaze onto a slim, black cat whose mannish voice continued to speak. "You don't intend to deceive this boy, do you? Is Abarai not also a friend of yours, Kisuke?"

"Ah, Yoruichi!" the smiling shop-keep gleamed. "Perhaps the oaf is better left to freeload in hell, no?" Kisuke felt his throat squeeze under the pressure of two solid hands.

"How can you joke like that?! How dare you!" Ichigo's voice rang with a demonic aura.

"Ah, geez." Kisuke brushed Ichigo's clutching fists away from him. "Relax Kurosaki. Sit." Ichigo sunk back onto his knees. "Do you know what happens when a soul reaper perishes?" Ichigo looked away. He hadn't the faintest clue. Kisuke grinned and the shadows around his eyes grew darker. "Their spiritual bodies break up into thousands of spirit particles. They become apart of the seireitei."

"What?" Ichigo heard his thoughts voice themselves. "What did you say?"

"You said yourself, Kurosaki, that Abarai was taken into the gates of hell?"

"Yes."

"Only humans can be taken to hell. That is, spirits existing outside the Soul Society… who've committed unforgivable acts. Get the picture, Kurosaki?"

"No."

Kisuke sighed. "If Abarai had died, he would have- for lack of a better word, disintegrated." The exile peered into Ichigo's brooding eyes. "Abarai should have dispersed into the fragments of atmosphere, but instead he was dragged into hell like a human sinner," Kisuke said with an unwelcome smile.

"It doesn't make sense," Ichigo concluded.

"No, It doesn't. Or rather," Kisuke smiled wider, "it shouldn't." 

…

Ichigo sat quietly in the darkening room. He thought of the many gruesome deeds that humans carry out day to day. These deeds were abolished, cleansed by the zanpakutō during ritual soul funerals; however, some deeds must remain despite purging. Many humans commit unforgivable crimes, so could there be almost as many souls in Hell as there are in Soul Society? And if that were true couldn't Hell function under the ruling of Monarchs? Could Hell be a sub-division, or some sort of twisted trading partner with Soul Society? Ichigo frowned with his thoughts.

A silky black slipped inside the room, blending and travelling along the shadows. Ichigo extended his hand to meet it, passing it along the length of it's soft back as the animal walked into his lap. "Ichigo," the cat spoke with an undertone of compassion. "You seem even more troubled since your meeting with Urahara Kisuke."

"Only one thing he said, sticks with me." Ichigo let his eyelids rest slightly, "And it was the only thing I understood." He brought his hand onto the cat's head. "And that would be… that only humans can go to hell."

"I see." Yoruichi paused with a sudden understanding. "I get it. You intend to go?"

"I'm human. It's possible."

Yoruichi rested her head onto Ichigo's leg, "Yes. It is that."

…

The air cooled with the freshness of dark, which filled Ichigo's lungs and rejuvenated him somewhat. He exhaled, his breath like a gust of warm breeze. The night was starless, as had every night been for Ichigo since _then_- Since Renji had exited this world.

Two bright, yellow eyes floated in the dark and approached Ichigo without so much as a sound. "If Shinigami dwell here… I wonder what it is that dwells _there_."

"In hell you mean?" Ichigo spoke to the cat. "I don't need to know. I just need to get there." If a cat had the ability to smile, Ichigo would daresay that Yoruichi was smiling now. "You stay here… cat." The boy wore a familiar grin.

Kisuke stood behind them, patiently waiting. "Are you ready Ichigo?" The boy nodded and Yoruichi joined Kisuke's side. "Good." Moments passed silently between the three. "Well, this'll be interesting."

Ichigo's palms were slick with sweat. He felt bile rising in his throat and swallowed it down. _Whatever it takes_, he reminded himself. _I will go through hell to find you, Renji. _"I'm ready, Urahara!" Ichigo announced with false confidence. "I'm ready."

He'd seen the gates of hell twice before, bony and skeletal as they radiated with contempt and malice, their ancient doors yawning and eternally collecting. He grit his teeth together, not quite afraid but sick with anxiety. This is not the first time he'd sought to challenge the unearthly and fateful forces of gods, but hell is not Soul Society. Rukia was not Renji.

"Okay, Ichigo. Just remember you asked for this!" Kisuke gleamed, his sense of adventure never truly fading, not even in exile. Ichigo peered over his shoulder at the man and nodded. Kisuke grinned and lifted Benhime, levelling her with his shoulder and gripping the cane as if it were an extension of his arm. The sky grew syrupy and provided a challenging resistance as Kisuke turned the cane. The sky began to crumple and tear.

Ichigo faced the punctured sky, staring defiantly into the quickly materializing world behind it. A spiritual passage way had opened. "You take a wrong turn; you end up in the seireitei," Kisuke warned. "Otherwise, you'll end up in hell's boondocks." The man's grin became crooked. "I pray you take the right path, wherever that takes you."

Ichigo muttered about the man's cheerfulness. Urging his legs to stride forward, Ichigo plunged himself into the passageway, the sky quickly seeping back together behind him.

Silence.

"Don't look like that, Yoruichi. You break my heart looking like that." Kisuke looked upon the cat, her fur endless as the black sky and her yellow eyes appearing as if they were wedged into the dark firmament.

"Kisuke," she whispered, shutting her eyes and momentarily disappearing. "How long do we wait before…" Her voice quieted into a low murmur.

"Two days," answered Kisuke. "Before we fetch him. Two days." The cat nodded.

…

Ichigo traveled swiftly through the wooden halls of the spiritual passage way. His tabi clad and waraji wrapped feet tapped rhythmically against the floor; his vision blurred with the continuous rush of pale shoji screens. _Where? Where is the end?!_ His thoughts seemed to echo within the tight halls.

_You take a wrong turn; you end up in the seireitei. _

It occurred to him that he needn't look for an end, only an exit- No, an entrance, a way into hell. Sometime during his contemplation he overstepped. His right foot sailing for a second too long, leaving him unbalanced. His body lurched over his right foot, now skidding onto his heel. His arms crossed over his chest awaiting impact as he crashed into the fragile shoji screen, but there was no impact. No floor on the other side, only a gentle darkness, which seemed to pull him forever deeper into blackness.

And so, Ichigo found himself suspended in a timeless abyss. A slight overstep, his own folly and carelessness seemingly condemning him to failure. _No, another chance. Give me another chance_, he pleaded to himself, his mind providing him with the only company available. He sunk deeper, until only darkness could be seen and quietness heard. His body was enticed to rest and although his mind was reluctant, he drowsed. His eyes and body were limp with a tired heaviness, as if his very soul was seeping away through his pores.

Wake up.

The message shot through him. He tore his eyes open and gasped for a breath. So close to death! His chest heaved and stung as he breathed. A trickling pain spread on his skin like fire until his entire backside burned with it. He clasped his open hands into fists, his knuckles knocked against hard ground. Ground. He rolled his eyes to the side, capturing the view of a stony ground beneath him. He lay on his back with his arms spread wide. Despite the agony resonating in his body, he pushed himself onto his bruised knees.

The air was light and warm, but laden with a thick despair. Ichigo could hear the blood beating within his ears, his skull hammering, his joints ripping. He drew another breath. The word 'hell' escaped from his lips. "Hell's Boondocks."

…

Ichigo looked overhead into the dense blackness. He'd fallen through. The spiritual passage must have been some sort of bridge into the seireitei, stretching over the expanse of hell's outskirts. "Kisuke!" Ichigo cursed loudly. "You bastard!" Ichigo squeezed his eyes shut, feeling a crisp breeze brush past him. He reopened his eyes, his vision shaky and unclear. He didn't know where he stood or how to proceed. It'd been so long since he'd felt so unsure, so lost.

The pressure was so much denser than that of the Human world, or the seireitei, and the orange, stony expanse continued on and on into what seemed an eternal emptiness. Ichigo huffed and stood upright on his quavering legs. Two steps forward. He willed himself a third step but remained still. His vision blurred under a red haze and his eyelids dropped. He swayed, rolling onto the balls of his feet as his muscles began to slack. He couldn't move. Time couldn't move.

Heavy footsteps neared slowly in the distance, their thump causing the stony earth to shiver beneath them. The noise grew louder in Ichigo's ears. It drew closer. Stone split under the crushing weight of the approaching foot, the cracking sending Ichigo into alertness. He felt the thumping shake his very bones, ringing in his skull. He brought his hands over his ears, releasing a hissing breath between his grinding teeth. The noise. That horrible crushing noise, threatening almost to crush him as well. He pressed his fists against his ears, until the footsteps ceased and only the wheezing breath above him could be heard. The hot breath passed over him, smelling of rank foods and intestinal fluids. Ichigo forced his gaze upward. Looking back onto him was a dark and gnarled beast, whose eyes shone like flames.

_If Shinigami dwell here… I wonder what it is that dwells there._

Ichigo swallowed a mouth full of air and frantically pawed for his zanpakuto. The large creature's gaze fell from Ichigo as it turned away and began stomping in a new direction. Ichigo's hand clasped itself around the hilt of Zangetsu. He stared blatantly at the slowly shrinking figure of the beast as it drew further away. Once the creature had disappeared entirely, Ichigo collapsed onto himself. His nails dug into the stony surface, gathering pebbles underneath them. He cried out. Frustration and angst overwhelmed him. His body ached and his mind roared.

"Where am I?!" he yelled into the stony oblivion, although he had a fair idea that he was adrift in hell. A glaze of water brimmed the corners of his eyes and he squeezed his fists tighter. Behind the veil of his eyelids, an image of crimson swam before him. That same deep colour flowing from a tanned scalp, framing a familiar face that flashed a white grin; black wisps of ink etched into tribal patterns along his skin, that soft skin. And those eyes, those magnificent eyes that reflected the same burning crimson of his hair. Ichigo shut his eyes tighter, finding refuge in the memory. Unclenching his fists, he passed his palms lightly over the pebbles on the warm stone and pressed his forehead to the ground. For so long he couldn't understand his feelings toward the other man. It left him confused and bitter and now he only yearned. It was a painful and desperate yearning for touch, contact, acceptance and daresay love? A void had opened within him.

The bleach-coloured strands of his hair bent with the breeze, as he stood tall against the expanse. Ichigo released the breath he hadn't realized he held before bursting off into a forward sprint_. I'll find you. I'll find you_, he repeated.

…

Ichigo's legs grew weary from the hours. He trudged along a sandy road he'd found only a few hours ago, pausing, he breathed in a large waft of air. He could smell something foul.

On the horizon lay a faint, black dot. This is where he headed. He let his head hang and proceeded travelling towards the dot. Only a few more hours, maybe two and he'd be there- it took four. At four hours, Ichigo planted his feet in the doorstep of the building that once lay on the horizon. It resembled a warehouse and the air was thick and smelly. "Hey!" Ichigo yelled foolishly. It was impulsive and he knew it, but he was tired and lonely and sore and didn't care.

"Aiya, aiya!" The old voice seemed to answer from all directions. "A Shinigami I see!" A figure rustled in the dark corner and waddled into the sunlight. He was an ancient man, withered and stunted. His yellow eyes peered out from his drooping brow. "Haven't seen one of your kind in centuries. Ah, but welcome, welcome!"

"Ah, old man, can you tell me where this is? I'm in need of direction." There was no point in being careful, not anymore. Ichigo rested his exhausted eyes on the elder.

"Well," the old man began. "This is… urm, well that is… boy, is this an honest question? You see this place has no name." The folds of the elder's skin stretched and sagged into an expression Ichigo couldn't decipher. "This is just a place… far away from the city, where we withered folk work to grind up the souls of the wicked." The elder's face reworked itself into a regretful picture. "That is, souls too wicked to be reborn."

"Grind… souls?" Ichigo thought aloud. "You?"

The elder squealed in delight, his screeching giggles causing the hairs on Ichigo's body to stand. The elder's mouth stretched into a toothless grin. "Yes, boy! As a Shinigami, you must worry for the souls of the departed, no? If you worry for these souls, than your worry is misplaced. We take good care of them, here. Oh yes! Special care!"

Ichigo swallowed down the bile rising in his throat. "Do all souls in hell get… grinded?" Whatever the old man had meant by grinding, Ichigo had felt it wasn't reversible.

"Not all, boy. Only the blackest ones." The elder grew serious. "Shinigami don't usually visit hell. Are you looking for a lost soul?"

Ichigo felt a surge of energy pulse through him. "Yes! Yes, I am. Another Shinigami. He passed about a month ago-"

"Ah," the elder breathed and shook his head. "Not here. No other Shinigami. Only you, my boy." Ichigo held back his relief. A quick rapping sounded from the other side of the wall. "Breaks over or so it seems," the elder commented, turning his attention to the wall. He brought his large, round knuckles to the wall and rapped back. He began to waddle back into the shadowy halls.

"Wait!"

The elder turned toward Ichigo.

"You said 'here' was far away from the city. What city? Where is it?" Ichigo spoke the words clearly, despite feeling unnerved. "How can I get there?"

The elder pointed his long, shaking finger to the right. "Train comes and goes… to the city at nightfall… to Hell's Port. Young Shinigami," the elder rasped. "Tis a place where evil festers. Keep your peepers open and you heart pure, if you want to last."

…

The pale, gray clouds overhead burned into a bloody red. It was night and Ichigo had already boarded the train of the damned. He leaned his body against the cool, metal interior, his head knocking against the window with train's rhythm- the clacking of the wheels beating in time with his despairing heart. He shut his drowsy eyes and dreamed, dreamed of the past.

_"Don't pick at your wounds." _

_Ichigo paused after hearing the raucous voice. "What?" he asked. The other man only pointed. Ichigo followed the direction of the man's finger, which lead to Ichigo's own hand that was currently half buried in a fresh scab. "But it itches," Ichigo reasoned. _

_The other man shook his head. "Means it's healing. Don't pick at it." _

_Ichigo grumbled and planted his palms onto the ground, dried blood crusted under his nails. He rested his eyelids, still feeling the other man's burning gaze. "What?" Ichigo asked, sounding more irritated then he felt. "Honestly." _

_The other man grinned, revealing his white teeth between his lips. "You froze up back there." _

_Ichigo remembered. "So?" _

"_You can't freeze up." _

"_Nice fucking advice." _

_The other man's grin widened, he motioned to Ichigo's wound with his eyes. "You got that coz you froze," he stated. _

"_I know!"_

_The other man's eyes lowered, his gaze grew cloudy. He ran his hand over his forearm, brushing the length of a newly wrapped bandage. "I got this," he started, "because you froze." _

_Ichigo's eyes widened. "What?" he rasped and then he remembered. It was true. He froze. And while the other man fought to defend him, he stood frozen, unable to move. It was shameful. "Don't blame me," Ichigo swallowed, half pleading. The other man shook his head again, his smile returning. _

"_I broke the line," the man confessed. "I left another soldier wide open. I didn't give it a second thought." The man's gaze flickered onto the ground, and a deep sadness flooded behind his crimson eyes. Ichigo didn't have to guess. He knew that the man had broken the line to save him- because he froze. "He died because me." The man looked at Ichigo with an unreadable expression. "So why don't I feel any remorse?" _

"_Renji," Ichigo whispered. _

Ichigo awoke slowly, parting his eyes almost bitterly. "Why am I remembering _that_ now?"

…

The city was crowded with unearthly beasts. The porter had told Ichigo that the men in hell followed their wretched hearts, and their hearts lead their bodies to twist and rot. "That's why they look that way," the porter continued. "This way their faces now show sorrow for their sins. And here," the porter pointed into the pale sky, "…are the guardians, who watch with their unforgiving eyes. They wait the pluck up the flesh of sinners, I think, and drag them to peace. Maybe, but maybe this is too good a reward for them. Maybe, they go somewhere else, but I don't imagine a worse destination than here."

Ichigo looked into the sky, watching dark condors circle above the city. He wondered if the birds were the 'guardians' the porter spoke of. He pushed the thought out of mind and asked, "Have you seen another man here dressed like me? With blood red hair and black mark-"

"Ah, Renji!" The porter exclaimed with a cheerful smile. "None other fits that description around here. Quite a sorry fellow, he is."

"Where is he?!" Ichigo blurted, startling the old porter.

"Believe him to be that way, young sir. At the Gama Den, but I warn you-"

"Thanks," Ichigo yelled after he bolted.

…

Renji sat, slouched on a yellow couch that looked as if it had once been white. He worked a needle into his arm, pressing forcefully and causing blood to leak onto his fingers. In a few minutes, he knew he wouldn't feel the pain, only peace. A woman leaned onto his shoulder, her slender figure plagued by spreading blue and slight horns that peeked through her forehead. "Pay attention to me," she whispered in his ear, and licked his neck.

"Get off me, you whore!" Renji shouted, stabbing her bloodless leg with the empty needle. The woman pouted and yanked the needle from her thigh, tossing it onto the floor.

She squeezed his leg and smirked, "You'll be more than willing in a few minutes. Always are, and then I'll have my way with you."

Renji didn't grasp her words, as all the sounds around him seemed so far now, and he didn't care that he couldn't hear them. A creeping euphoria began to bloom inside him. He senses sharpened, but he felt numb at the same time. He leaned back onto the couch, letting his head hang back over the edge. He felt the woman crawl on top of him, her lips closing around his collarbone. "Don't," he breathed half-heartedly. Her tongue darted into his mouth.

"I always enjoy our time together," she smiled, bringing her hand lower. "You're the most beautiful man I've ever seen."

"Shut up," Renji's voice quieted and his body relaxed. He was lost in his own world. Nothing mattered here.


	2. Loves

**BLEACH: HOUSE BUILT ON SAND, SEQUEL TO A LINE IN THE SAND**

Ichigo pushed through the crowded room. It was dark and plumes of smoke swirled through the dim ceiling lamps. He felt desperation swelling inside himself and the excitement of recovering his lost friend quickly faded. He could sense despair within the room, curling alongside the smoke. Scents of opium and tobacco were its companion. "Renji!" he shouted, but it was lost amoung the hushed voices and laughter. "Renji!"

Ichigo threw a large, deformed spirit onto the ground and raced forward, almost stumbling over two women in copulation on the carpet. He hit his shin on a low table, but he didn't have time to process the pain as his eyes had found the man he had sought for so long. Just ahead of him was Renji, half stripped and slumped over, sitting on a stained couch. "Renji!" Ichigo pushed his way over to the other man, shouting his name, but Renji never looked up. _Why can't he hear me?_ Ichigo thought, his heart pounding. Ichigo felt an abrupt hand over his chest, halting him. A beastman stood in front of him.

"Don't bother," the beastman laughed. "Renji's in a different world right now." Ichigo stood in incomprehension and then tore himself away from the beastman. He continued over to Renji and knelt before him. Renji eyes were shut and his breathing was shallow and calm. Tears stung Ichigo's dry, red eyes and his mouth curved into a small smile. Reaching up, he cupped Renji's cheek in his palm.

Renji's eyes cracked open, hazy, crimson pupils slid behind them. "Ichigo?" Renji called hoarsely.

Ichigo's smile widened, his heart heaved. "Yes," he licked his dry lips. "Yes, Renji it's me." Ichigo lifted his other hand and grabbed Renji's face.

Renji's wandering gaze rested onto Ichigo and he smiled lazily. It broke Ichigo's heart. Tears ran freely down the young Shimigami's face and he smiled despite the hurting in his heart. Ichigo dropped his hands and collapsed onto Renji's lap, exhaustion and strain finally catching up to him. He felt Renji's hand brush through his hair, and tears spilt forth anew.

"Ichigo. You're crying."

Ichigo looked up at Renji's peaceful face. "Idiot," he whimpered, smearing away his tears with his hand. Renji could feel himself coming down, sobering slightly.

"Memories grow legs in hell," Renji said in a comforting tone. "And you haunt me."

"What?" Ichigo whispered gently. Renji rested his head on Ichigo's, his large hands settling on the boy's shoulders.

"Are you real this time?" Renji asked with a sigh, his eyes closed.

"Renji, I don't understand."

Renji brought his arms around Ichigo's neck and leaned into him. Ichigo held under the man's weight as he whispered in his ear, "Ichigo. I'm gonna be sick."

"Wha- what?!"

…

Ichigo trudged up the squeaking stairway, and headed toward the far room down the hallway, which an amused spirit had directed him to. "That's Renji's place," he'd said after the redhead had gotten sick all over Ichigo. "You can clean up his sorry ass there. That lucky bastard! He's always got pretty spirits lookin' after him!"

Ichigo entered the room. It was hardly cozy, but at least it didn't smell rancid like the rest of the place. He lifted Renji's arm from his shoulder and let the man wander. "Sorry, you can change into something… something… over… there?" Renji proposed as he pointed sluggishly to a wooden dresser and then disappeared into what Ichigo guessed was a bathroom. When Renji returned, Ichigo stood naked inside a pair of dark hakama- his soiled shihakusho sitting in a basin of green, stagnant water. "You're still here?" Renji's face contorted with hurtful confusion. He had figured Ichigo for a simple hallucination. Ichigo stood still, trying to make sense of everything. Renji strode over to him.

Ichigo clasped his shaking hands around the other's wrist. Realization dawning on him as he finally noticed the scars on Renji's arm. Ichigo swallowed hard and squeezed his eyes shut. Scars from needles, and fresh wounds from them, decorated Renji's arms with pinkish flecks. Ichigo latched onto Renji and mumbled into his shirt. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"Ichigo?" Renji's voice was clear and surprised. He returned the boy's embrace tighter. "I didn't think-" he tore Ichigo away from him and looked at him sharply.

Ichigo could feel Renji's eyes searching him for answers. "It's me. I swear, it's me."

"Impossible," he mumbled and then looked away. He recognized that the boy he held was truly Ichigo. "You crazy fuck," Renji said, his voice cracking.

"Why did you…" Ichigo began, touching the scars on Renji's arms, "do this to yourself?"

Renji frowned. "Because I was outta my mind," he answered honestly.

Ichigo trembled with the thoughts of Renji hurting himself like this. He wanted to yell or hit, but he stood motionless. His mind raced until his thoughts settled and quieted. He could feel Renji's breath lightly on his face- and then he felt Renji's hands on him.

"You're a ghost," Renji breathed softly, tilting Ichigo's chin toward him with his hand. He grinned all to familiarly; his white teeth gleamed through his lips. "You haunt me." Renji brushed his lips lightly, so lightly, against Ichigo's.

The boy melted under him. He reached to kiss Renji back, his lower body melding against the other. Renji brought a hand around Ichigo's neck and kissed him more fervently, his other hand snaking around Ichigo's waist.

The boy breathed sharply, his stomach knotted with a welcome nervousness; excitement stirred in him as Renji proceeded to kiss him deeper. Renji slid his hand into the gaping sides of Ichigo's hakama. "Ah," Ichigo breathed in surprise. Renji's mouth curled in amusement. He enjoyed making Ichigo writhe.

He pushed Ichigo up against the wall, and brought his lips down onto the boy's neck, sucking on the tender, white skin. Ichigo breathed heavier; he became flustered and wasn't sure what to do with his hands. Ichigo had never been with a man, and his only relationship, which had been with Rukia, had never been a very passionate one. A moan escaped with Ichigo's panting breath. The boy tried to stay silent as Renji's mouth trailed lower, but his stifled moan came out instead as a grunt. Ichigo flushed, embarrassed with his own inexperience.

Renji wrapped his hand around the boy's throbbing phallus. "Uhn," Ichigo gasped, swallowing his startle. "Ren-Renji," he panted. "Ah, wh-what're you doing?"

Renji smiled crookedly as he ran his tongue down to Ichigo's pelvis, sliding it across the rim of the boy's bulging hakama. Renji's hand slid under, and tugged the fabric away, freeing Ichigo. The boy's stomach knotted up and his breathing grew faster. Renji grinned, "I wanna taste you," he said, licking the tip of Ichigo's weeping phallus before taking it into his mouth.

"Ah… un! Renji!" Ichigo whimpered, between his gasps. The boy clawed at the wall behind him. He could feel the muscles in the back of Renji's throat pulsing around him. Ichigo felt his blood prickle under his skin with the climax of pleasure and he came into Renji's mouth embarrassingly quick. Renji swallowed twice and whipped his head up. His mouth was open and a white trail of seed dripped from the corner of his mouth; he inhaled a mass of air.

Ichigo flushed deeper when Renji met his gaze. Ichigo fought to catch his breath. Renji grinned and rose to suckle on Ichigo's neck, his lips eventually travelling onto the boy's and kissing him tenderly. Ichigo squirmed under Renji's pressing body. Tears formed at the corner of the boy's eyes. He'd wanted this. Oh God, he wanted it badly! Ichigo felt sick with desire and he hated himself for it. He couldn't deny that he'd hoped for this kind of reunion, but he couldn't help but feel as though he was taking advantage of Renji.

Ichigo gritted his teeth together, breathy moans trapped and humming in his throat. He shut his eyes, feeling the delicious pleasure of Renji sucking on his shoulder. Ichigo could feel himself growing hard again. He tried to suppress it. He stared at the ceiling. _After everything he may have been through, _thought Ichigo,_ what is it costing Renji to give this kind of intimacy?_ The thought that this act may very well be destroying his lover, was too much for Ichigo to bear. "Renji," the boy cried. "Stop. Please stop."

Renji pulled his lips away from Ichigo's body. The boy paused and swallowed hard, trying to find Renji's eyes, which were hidden under his crimson strands. "Renji," Ichigo's voice trembled. "Renji, look at me… please."

Renji lifted his head, his miserable and bleak eyes shifting to meet Ichigo's.

"Renji," Ichigo frowned, holding back his tears. "Renji, I'm so sorry." Ichigo wrapped his arms around Renji's neck and sunk to the floor, dragging Renji down with him.

Renji sat on his knees, his head bowed over Ichigo's shoulder and remained utterly silent. Ichigo sobbed into Renji's hair, wondering just how he couldn't have seen how broken and destroyed his friend truly was. After a moment, Renji lifted his head and gazed into Ichigo's red, swollen eyes.

"I…" Ichigo sobbed. "I can't use you like this…"

Renji gave a half smile. "I'm useless. Just use me." He brought his hand to the boy's neck.

"I can't."

Renji rested his forehead onto Ichigo's shoulder. His brow knitted in defeat and he shouted, "What can I give you?!"

Ichigo was shocked. He grabbed onto Renji's neck, "You don't need to give me anything. Not a thing." Ichigo's voice was pleading and frightened.

Renji slid his hands under the boy's arms, lifting them both onto their feet. The man whispered something too quietly for Ichigo to hear, but something familiar light up behind his crimson eyes. Something feral. Half of Renji's mouth twisted into a smile.

"Renji?"

The man laughed, gracious and wild. It was almost contagious. He tossed Ichigo roughly onto a futon, which lay behind them. Before Ichigo could sit up, Renji trapped the boy underneath him. His crimson hair spilling onto the boy's bare chest, "don't be so careful with me," he grumbled.

Ichigo's eyes widened. "What?"

"This is okay," Renji said, dipping his head to lick Ichigo's chest. Ichigo bit into his lower lip, suppressing a moan. "This is definitely okay."

Renji's tongue found its way into Ichigo's mouth and as he kissed the boy, he fumbled to get out of his yukata. Ichigo assisted, tearing the cotton fabric from Renji's shoulders. Renji threw the light kimono to the floor and refocused his attentions back to Ichigo.

Ichigo reached and ran his hands down Renji's chest, his fingers stumbling over a raw, uneven area of skin. The boy looked, his fingers rested on large, jagged scar. It was the place where Renji had run Zabimaru through his own chest, only a month prior. Ichigo met Renji's gaze with concern. The man grabbed his hand away. "It didn't heal well," he growled before returning his lips to Ichigo's.

Ichigo pushed Renji away, looking at him squarely. "We should talk about this," the boy's tone was serious and dangerous.

"No, we shouldn't," Renji answered coldly, trying to lessen the distant that Ichigo created between their bodies.

Ichigo pressed his palms harder to the man's chest, keeping Renji at bay. "Renji, you _killed_ yourself."

"No, I-"

"You did," Ichigo cut off his excuse sharply. He brought one palm around Renji's elbow, curling his fingers around and into the man's sore forearm. "And now your using drugs." Renji opened his mouth to protest, to dispatch Ichigo's concern or disapproval, but words failed him. "What did you take?" Ichigo's voice seemed sympathetic enough, but his eyes were hard- too hard.

"Nothing! Look," Renji started tersely, sounding flippant. "I really don't want to lose my erection right now, so can we talk about this so other time?"

Ichigo scrunched his face in frustration and gave Renji's shoulders a powerful shove, leaving the man sitting upright and alone on the futon. Ichigo stood with his back facing him. He stood there for several moments, just resting a hand on his temple. Renji sat slightly dazed and quiet behind him. Ichigo swung around abruptly, his face contorted with rage, "Don't lie to me!"

Renji slipped into his yukata; his face was stuck in an annoyed expression.

Ichigo's voice echoed down the hall and the boy stood breathing hard awaiting his answer. And it came, although he didn't feel ready for it.

"Nothing I can't stop."

Ichigo paused hearing the words. He looked up to find Renji was glaring at him. Ichigo swallowed. "You don't know, do you?" he asked unfalteringly, although he was filled with dread.

Renji gaped. "I…" He looked away quickly. "Of course I know!" Renji spat the words fiercely. Suddenly, he found himself pinned against the far wall. Ichigo's fist was clenched around Renji's kimono. "Don't look at me like that," Renji pleaded angrily.

Ichigo's eyes were unreadable.

"Listen," Renji began, "I swear it's nothing to worry about it." He moved his arms to embrace Ichigo tenderly. "Yeah, I made some flawed choices, but I'm… alright. And this is nothing to get so worked up over."

Ichigo's fist loosened. Renji rested his chin atop the bleached strands of the boy's hair. "I'm no more _dead_ than I was as a Shinigami, and I can _stop_ the drugs anytime." Renji's mouth twitched. "So all that shit's just in the past now, got it?"

"Swear you're alright," Ichigo demanded. "Honestly," he added.

"Yeah, I'm alright. I'm just fine."

That night, Ichigo slept soundly. He lay next to Renji, on the futon they had fought on only hours ago. They both slept into the next afternoon, awaking groggy and stiff. The night was warm, and both men were slick with sweat. Renji padded instinctively toward the bathroom and Ichigo followed.

"That's a pretty big basin," Ichigo noted, his head tilted to the side.

"Yeah, I've got privileges around here. Biggest room."

"Oh? And why's that?" Ichigo watched as Renji tested the water.

"Still warm," Renji commented before answering. "And that would be because I still possess captain level rieatsu."

"So you what…? Beat people up?" Ichigo laughed. Renji hoisted his naked self into the basin.

"Yeah," Renji smirked. Ichigo scoffed.

"How old's that water?"

"Was fresh this morning. Spirit girls fill this up for me twice a day, everyday. Pretty ones."

Ichigo crossed his arms.

"Jealous?" Renji teased.

"No," Ichigo responded a bit too quickly before hopping in to join Renji. "No soap?"

"What do you think this is? A hotel?"

"Fair enough." Ichigo settled for rinsing the sweat off his sick, but even so he'd still felt dirty. After a minute, Ichigo began scrubbing his arms vigorously with his hands. He hated feeling unclean. He paused when he felt Renji looming behind him.

"What's the matter Ichigo? Don't like getting dirty?"

Ichigo shuddered and pulled his arms closely across his chest. He took in a sharp breath and held it as he felt Renji's hands slide onto his stomach. Ichigo could feel Renji's chest rising and falling behind him, and his wet crimson hair dripping onto his chest. The man's breath was warm against his neck.

Renji teased the boy's earlobe with his lips and whispered to him, "Ichigo, you started something with me yesterday." Renji hands trailed lower and Ichigo suppressed a whimper. "Want to finish it?" Renji dropped his mouth to Ichigo's neck.

Ichigo swallowed hard and rested his arms over Renji's. "Yes," he said quietly, shutting his eyes. Renji's voice hummed with agreement; Ichigo could feel the vibrations of the man's throat and it caused him to shiver.

Renji's mouth curled in amusement. He reached down Ichigo's body, discovering the boy's rigid phallus. He looked over Ichigo's shoulder, peering down into the water where the tip of Ichigo's phallus bobbed and occasionally poked the boy in the stomach. Renji's laugh caught in his throat, "See how excited I make you?"

Ichigo breathed through his mouth, gasping whenever Renji touched him. The boy faced the wooden edge of the basin and gripped it for support. "Yes," he breathed helplessly.

Renji coiled a hand around Ichigo's throat. The boy could feel the smile on Renji's lips as the man kissed his neck. "Renji," Ichigo panted, his grip tightening on the basin's edge.

Renji's grin widened. He loved winding the boy up. "Yeah, Ichigo?"

"Nnn…" The boy panted as Renji's hands proceeded to touch and grope. "…Hah… ah! Renji!"

"Hm?"

Ichigo wanted to speak, but he could only gasp loudly as Renji slipped two fingers inside him. The man curled his fingers inside Ichigo, searching for that certain spot. "Fuck," Renji whispered, "you're so tight. Just relax."

Ichigo bit the inside of his cheek. "Jesus!" He shouted as Renji hit that certain bundle of nerves. "Ah! Renji!" Ichigo shut his eyes tightly as the man behind him continued to rub that special spot inside him. Renji slid his fingers out of Ichigo and pressed up against the boy's back.

"Yeah?" he answered lowly, pressing his cheek against Ichigo's.

"Do it already," Ichigo whimpered.

"You won't regret this?" Renji asked, all the previous playfulness now absent from his tone.

"No," Ichigo grunted. "Just fuck me," he panted, "please."

With that Renji entered Ichigo, impaling him slowly inch by inch. The boy cried out loudly, his nails digging into the basin. Renji hugged Ichigo from behind, his own breathing increasing as he thrust himself into Ichigo. The man's moist lips brushed against Ichigo's shoulder rhythmically and the boy took comfort in hearing Renji moan.

Water slapped against the basin as Renji pushed harder and faster. He lifted his arm and gripped the edge of the basin to brace himself as water sloshed onto the floor. He brought his other hand onto Ichigo's hip.

Ichigo placed his hand over Renji's, which also gripped the basin, and using its wooden walls as support, Ichigo pushed off, through his feet, down into the man. Renji gasped and swore, quickly taking his hand from Ichigo's hip and grabbing onto the basin's edge to keep from slipping. Ichigo lifted his hand and gripped Renji's other arm.

Renji, taking notice of Ichigo's arms, which now rested on top of his, growled into the boy's ear, "What am I? Your fucking arm chair?" Ichigo threw his head back onto Renji's shoulder, his mouth pressed together to stifle his whimpering. "Fuck," Renji cursed, the sight driving him over as he spent himself.

Renji grabbed Ichigo's shoulder, turning him around violently. Ichigo's back slammed against the wooden edge, causing more water to spill. The boy let out a hissing breath, trying not to cry out from the pain that burned in his back. "Ah!" Ichigo gasped as Renji gripped the boy's aching arousal. Renji's lips met Ichigo's roughly and the man's grip slid quickly down and up Ichigo's phallus, squeezing it at times. "Uh… Ah," Ichigo grunted, gritting his teeth together. The boy spilt his seed into the water, and Renji took his hand away. Ichigo fought to catch his breath. "You're so rough," he managed to say between pants.

Renji looked onto Ichigo and grinned. "Can't help it." He lifted himself out the basin, his body tired and satisfied. After a moment, the boy followed after him.

…

The two lounged in the main room, lying on the floor in the sunlight. For the duration of the evening they talked, drifting in and out of sleep. Ichigo propped himself onto his elbow, and Renji looked up at him. The boy opened his mouth to speak, but he fell short of words. Instead he leaned down onto the other man and kissed him. Ichigo broke away, his eyes looking back at Renji with desperation and inability to express himself.

"I know," Renji whispered. "I know. I feel the same way too."

There was love, it filled up the wounds of both men and there was healing in it- love, pure love that they had found in hell. The irony didn't escape them. They fell asleep together and Ichigo had slept well for the second time.

In the morning, Ichigo awoke alone. The side where Renji slept had grown cold. The boy dressed and padded into the bathroom. No Renji. Ichigo frowned and poked his head out the door, peering down the rank corridor. It was empty except for one small spirit girl. He waved her over. "Hey there," his voice was as polite as he could manage. "Have you seen Renji this morning?" The spirit girl raised an eyebrow. "He's a tall guy. Red hair and eyes-"

"Oh, I know who he is," she quipped. She smiled and revealed a set of yellow fangs.

"Okay," Ichigo swallowed. "So have you… seen him?"

"…Alright, alright. I'll help you out, I guess. He went down into the den, got something and came back up. He'll be back in a bit, little boy, just hold your horses."

Ichigo grabbed her. "What did he get?! Where did he go?!"

The spirit smiled and shrugged. "So you're the guy he's been shacked up with? How badly do you want to know?"

"Tell me, now."


	3. Company

**BLEACH: HOUSE BUILT ON SAND, SEQUEL TO A LINE IN THE SAND**

Ichigo barged through the door and burst onto the roof. He took a few steps forward and scanned the area. _Damn_, he thought. There were plenty of protruding vents and smoke stacks, plenty of things to hide behind. "Renji! Renji Abarai! Where the fuck are you?!"

"Calm down," a stranger's voice cooed in Ichigo's ear. "We've been takin' care of 'im for ya." Another gnarled spirit appeared at the stranger's side. "Now 'aven't we darlin'?"

"Of course," the gnarled spirit winked sweetly.

"Where is he?" Ichigo barked.

"Oy, manners now man. We ain't hiding 'im from ya." The stranger pointed to a silver vent. "Reckon you'll find 'im over there, yeah?" The spirit pair laughed and exited. Ichigo rushed around the vent.

He found Renji leaning against the vent, amongst a crowd of dazed spirits. At his side was a pretty spirit girl, untying a black band that was fastened around Renji's upper arm. _No_, Ichigo thought. _No_! He raced to crouch in front of him, his eyes searching for Renji's. Ichigo felt despair climbing inside him. He swallowed hard and asked the pretty spirit girl calmly, "What did you give him?"

"Just a bit of heaven on hell," she smirked. Ichigo snarled and she disappeared.

"Renji," Ichigo called, lightly tapping the man's face. "Renji?"

The man grasped Ichigo's wrist gently. "Hey," Renji answered softly.

"Renji! What," Ichigo panicked, hurt and anger swelled inside him, "What did you do? What did you do?!"

"I…" Renji looked around lazily. "Where are we?"

"Just- The roof, Renji! We're on the roof! Now what… what…" Ichigo stopped himself. "Why," his voice cracked, "why did you-?"

Renji brought his hands onto Ichigo's mouth and gave a half smile. "I love you."

"What?" Ichigo froze. He felt a strange hand on his shoulder. Its owner was an ugly spirit.

"Don't take what he says to heart, kid. He says that to anyone when he's fucked," the spirit laughed. Ichigo clenched his fist. He couldn't take it. He threw his trembling fist into the spirit's face, crushing its ugly nose. Voices and angry cries rose around the young Shinigami, but no one challenged him. Ichigo turned back to Renji.

"We're leaving, Renji," Ichigo spat and he lifted the larger man onto his shoulder. Behind them countless giggles and laughter erupted.

…

Ichigo entered the sunny room and dragged Renji over to the futon. He tried to drop him onto the bed, but Renji hung onto him. "Renji," Ichigo said seriously. "Let go."

Renji looked back at Ichigo with fear shining in his eyes. It startled Ichigo a bit. "I can't," Renji said.

"Idiot! What do you mean you can't?!"

_He'll leave you if you let him go_! Laughter echoed in Renji's head. He willed it to stop, but the voice continued. _Go ahead, hang onto him_! Renji sighed. "I can't think straight."

"Of course not, you idiot. What'd you expect?! What the fuck did you take anyway?!" Ichigo roared.

Renji's hand loosened and he dropped onto the futon. "I don't know," he mumbled, lying on his back.

Ichigo hid his frustrated eyes behind his hands and sighed. "What am I supposed to do?" Ichigo asked himself quietly.

"Am I standing?" Renji asked.

"No."

"My body feels useless."

"It is."

"I can't really see anymore."

"Good."

Renji rolled his eyes into the back of his head. His mouth was dry and he couldn't feel anything anymore; he knew inside himself that this was wrong, that what he was doing was wrong, but he couldn't stop. _I'm weak_, he thought to himself. _I can't do anything right, I can't_… his mind wandered further. He thought of his former captain, Byakuya Kuchiki, ripping him apart with his Senbon Zakura. Renji remembered the pain and the blood of his defeat. It hurt and it didn't.

_Rukia._

Renji saw her image swim onto the ceiling; he reached to try and touch it. It seemed so far away. _Rukia, you have a family again, but I_, Renji voiced the words inside himself. _I'll always be a stray dog_. _I'll let you go… so you can be happy. _ Renji felt a warmth clasp his outstretched hand. His eyes focussed and he saw that it was Ichigo.

"What are you staring at?" the boy asked gently. "Do I even want to know?"

Renji shook his head. His mind felt clearer and he felt like he was in his body again. He looked up at Ichigo, feeling pathetic. He couldn't fathom why the boy hadn't left him, why he would even look twice at him. And he didn't understand what a person like Ichigo was doing with a guy like him. He realized then that he didn't deserve the boy; he didn't deserve friendship or love. He deserved to be in hell.

Ichigo looked into Renji's miserable eyes. "I'm not going to leave you," he said to the man. "But you can't keep doing this to yourself… or to me."

Renji mulled over the words and sat up, letting go of Ichigo's hand. His forearm ached and it was nearly unbearable. He wanted to be good to Ichigo, he wanted to be so good, but he wasn't and he knew it. His arm throbbed again and the man laughed dejectedly.

There was a knock at the door.

Ichigo jumped off the bed and strode over to it, but before he could answer it, it burst open. Two spirits nailed Ichigo against the wall, pressing his shoulder blades with makeshift weapons. "What the fuck is this?!" Ichigo spat.

Another large spirit entered the doorway; it scoffed at Ichigo and continued over to Renji. Ichigo watched with wide eyes, too shocked to respond. The spirit grabbed Renji with its powerful hands, "You've been fucking around for almost three days," it howled. "You pay for it now! No one crosses me!"

"You think," Renji started darkly, "that you're a match for me? I'll do whatever the fuck I want."

"You've worn out your welcome!" The spirit howled again as a mob formulated behind him. Ichigo saw Renji's mouth curl.

"Ichigo," Renji said. "Look away."

"What?!" the boy screamed.

"I can't kill them if you're looking at me," Renji answered. "So, look away." Ichigo didn't. He watched as Renji's hand sunk deep into his opponent's chest, ripping away as inky blood spurted into his crimson hair. The spirit sunk to its knees and Renji leaped over him, dashing into the mob and dispatching five more spirits before Ichigo could blink.

"Stop," Ichigo mouthed in horror as he watched his lover. _Those are spirits, they're people. You're destroying them_! The fallen spirits screamed as they're bodies broke into pieces. The boy couldn't look away. He kept watching as Renji swung around, creating a dance to the song of snapping bones and cries. _This isn't justified_, Ichigo thought- this wasn't like purifying the damned souls of hollows, no this… this was murder. "Renji! Renji stop!"

Renji froze. He looked onto Ichigo's horrified face and in that moment, a spirit struck the man from behind. Renji felt his hot blood leak down his temple and fell onto his knees. _I'm sorry, Ichigo_. _Why can't I be good? I want so bad to be good_.

A red haze clouded Renji's vision. He felt his existence weakening, his hold on the world failing. He heard Ichigo yelling to him, but he couldn't grasp the words_. Is this it? Is this the end?_ Renji heard his breathing ring in his ears._ If I disappear, where will I go? I should disappear._

Renji woke up in a dimly light room, his head bandaged. He could make out the silhouettes of two men and a woman through a shoji screen. Ichigo was among them. He didn't know yet, but it was Yoruichi and Kisuke who had arrived shortly after the brawl and broke it up. And it was them who stood conversing with Ichigo. Renji stood and listened discreetly.

"We waited two days before pursuing you. Sorry, we were a tad late," the blonde exile shrugged. "I didn't think it would take three days to find you; however," Kisuke grew serious. "About Renji-"

"Kisuke," Yoruichi said softly. "Please."

Kisuke sighed. "It's your call Ichigo."

Ichigo turned his gaze to the floor. He wanted to believe in Renji. He wanted to believe he'd make a full recovery, but doubt still lingered in his mind. He swallowed, ""I-"

Renji pried the screen open and walked into the room. The three gave him startled looks as he peeled the bandage from his forehead.

"Abarai," Yoruichi called. "How are you feeling."

Renji sneered, "Like myself."

"Renji," Ichigo grabbed the man's arm. "Come with me, okay?"

…

Ichigo lead the man outside. The air was sweet and the sun beamed through the cloudy, blue sky. Renji let his eyes adjust, savouring the feel off the soft grass beneath his feet. It'd been so long. It almost felt like home. "You're brooding," Renji commented, looking into the sky.

Ichigo laughed quietly. "There's a lot to think about."

Renji thought about it, but nothing came to mind. He felt at a loss. "Like what?" He asked with a frown.

"You serious?"

Renji shrugged. "You don't know how to get back, is that it?" he guessed.

"I haven't even thought that far ahead yet. I'm just putting my faith in Urahara and Yoruichi."

"I'm sure your faith ain't misplaced, but if they're out of ideas…" Renji hesitated. "I know a way… into the human world." Ichigo's eyes widened.

"Renji, then why-?"

"It's… complicated."

"No, I get it." Ichigo said, disgust and hurt evident in his voice. "You didn't want to go back! You were just going to- Fuck! Do you have any idea what I went through?! God you're so-!"

"You're so fucking noisy," Renji barked. Ichigo paused in shock. "You have no idea."

"What?!" Ichigo flared. Renji grabbed onto the boys shoulders, gripping them hard enough that Ichigo winced.

"I can't go back! You think it's a mistake that I'm down here? Just a what? Some sort of misunderstanding?! That I could just say, 'hey, let me out of hell. I'm a Shinigami!" And then they'd say, 'Oh. Alright! Here's your ticket outta hell now have a nice day.'?!" Renji let the boy go and turned away. "Fuck, Ichigo! You don't think I tried? You don't think it killed me to know how I left you up there?"

…

"Oh, Yoruichi! Come here!" Kisuke cooed. "I found them," the shop-keep smiled and pointed out the window. "See? Oh my, it looks like they're fighting."

"Huh? That right?" Yoruichi said, standing beside Kisuke.

…

Ichigo broke the long silence, "I'm still mad with you."

"I'm used to it."

"What's that supposed to mean?!"

"Nothing," Renji walked up to Ichigo, leaving very little space between them. "I don't want to fight with you."

"Then maybe you shouldn't ta-!" Ichigo couldn't finish because his lips were otherwise occupied.

…

Kisuke gaped. "Well, that was unexpected… I didn't think the nature of their relationship was so… close. I mean _I knew_ they were chummy, but," Kisuke hid his face behind a fluttering fan and pointed, "Do friends usually kiss like that?"

Yoruichi wore a vastly entertained grin, "Nope."

"Huh," Kisuke tilted his head, still staring at the pair. "So… who do you think will top?"

"Well… Renji's got a few inches on Ichigo," Yoruichi speculated. Kisuke paled, wondering if that had held some double meaning. "So height wise, he's got the advantage." They exchanged a knowing look before returning to watch the two lovers.

…

"Uh… Renji," Ichigo managed while the redhead sucked on his neck. "We can't do this here." Renji wasn't listening; he was busy untying Ichigo's hakama. Ichigo breathed hard. "Wait," he panted. Renji continued to ignore him, his hands now exploring under Ichigo's freshly washed shihakusho. "Renji…? Nnh… Renji, are you listeni- ah! Careful!"

"Shut up," Renji groaned, moving his mouth over Ichigo's. He kissed him deeply, and Ichigo stopped his protests. Renji brought his foot behind Ichigo's, tripping the boy and bringing him to the ground.

"That's a dirty trick," Ichigo whined as the larger man crawled on top of him.

"Yeah?" he teased, removing Ichigo's shirts. "Want to see more? I'm full of 'em."

…

"Ow! Ow!" Yoruichi and Kisuke cheered with each other, still overly engrossed with watching the two.

…

Renji broke away from Ichigo's mouth, "Did you hear something?"

"No," Ichigo pulled Renji's face back and continued to kiss him. Renji shrugged out of his shirts, letting them hang at his waist. "So," Ichigo breathed. "How do you want to this?" Renji groaned and began to kiss Ichigo's chest. "You're supposed to have lube, right? To do this?"

"Yeah," Renji licked Ichigo's nipple.

"I don't have any," the boy panted.

"Obviously."

"What's that sup-? Never mind," Ichigo looked away. "Just… do it anyway. I don't care."

Renji looked up for a moment, twisting his face into an obvious expression of contemplation. "No, I don't think so." He started back to Ichigo's chest.

"Then figure- Ah! Don't bite me! –something out! Quick!"

Renji sighed, then glanced sideways at Ichigo. "How mad are you at me?"

"Honestly, I think I could kill you."

"That's perfect," Renji grinned. "I'll let you have _me_ then."

"What?" Ichigo breathed. Renji went back to Ichigo's neck, teasing it with his lips.

"If you think you can do it." Renji laughed at Ichigo's nearly terrified expression. "What? You don't think you can figure it out?" Renji kissed Ichigo's throat with a rare tenderness. "I'll help ya out then," Renji grinned. "It's up, down, repeat."

"Don't mock me," Ichigo shouted, flipping Renji onto his back and startling the man momentarily.

"Guess this is go then?" Renji said plainly, resting his hands behind his head. Ichigo fumbled with Renji's hakama; his fingers trembling with nervousness. Renji sat up and cupped Ichigo's face.

"Don't be so nervous," he soothed and then kissed the boy. Wrapping his hand around Ichigo's erect phallus, Renji whispered, "Don't worry. You won't hurt me with this tiny thing."

Ichigo felt a vein pop in his head. "That does it," he snarled. He pushed Renji back onto the ground and tugged the man's pants off violently.

…

"What's going on now?" Kisuke asked Yoruichi.

"Ichigo's topping."

"Really?!"

"Looks that way, but- Holy shit!"

"What?! What'd I miss?! I just blinked!!"

"Ichigo is going to do it dry."

"…Is it okay for us to be having this conversation?"

"Ah! Renji! I didn't know you were such a masochist! No wonder you have so many tattoos!"

Kisuke pointed, "You mean… sex like that hurts?"

Yoruichi nodded. "Yes, my dear Kisuke! 'Tis times like these I wish we had Unit Four on standby…"

Kisuke grinned, "Oh boy. This'll be interesting. Hey Yoruichi, go grab those chairs from the next room!"

…

Ichigo tried to think quickly. _Okay, pants are off… What do I do next? Damn, what'd Renji do? Oh yeah_! Ichigo squeezed his two fingers together, but before he could go any further, Renji grabbed his wrist. "What?" Ichigo blinked. …_This the wrong hand or something?_

"I hate that shit," Renji mumbled. "No fingers."

Ichigo nodded and adjusted himself so that Renji's feet were above his head. He noticed that Renji wasn't looking at him. "What's your problem?! Stop acting like you're bored!"

Renji smiled and brought his mouth onto Ichigo's jaw, leaving a trail of light kisses behind as he pressed his lips to the boys. Ichigo kissed him back enthusiastically. Renji slid his hand down Ichigo's chest and curled his finger's around the boy's throbbing phallus, giving it a playful squeeze.

"Renji," Ichigo panted, feeling a terrible desire stir within him. "I can't wait anymore."

"Then don't," Renji said. He licked Ichigo's lips and whispered in his ear, "Make me yours."

Excitement overwhelmed Ichigo and he pushed himself hard against Renji, driving himself as deeply as he could. Renji jerked his head away, his eyes and mouth shut tightly as he fought from screaming. Ichigo continued fiercely, caught in his desire, and plunged ruthlessly into Renji as hard and as quickly as he could.

Renji clenched his jaw shut to quiet his cries. His face was contorted with agony and he brought up his hand to cover it. Shivers of intense pain shot up his spine. He squeezed his eyes shut trying to bear it. He wanted to yell out, to tell Ichigo to stop, but he wouldn't let himself speak. _Endure it_, he told himself. _Endure it_. Renji gnashed his teeth together, small grunts of anguish hissed through. Ichigo didn't notice, he was nearing his own ecstasy and pushed more forcefully.

Renji clawed his hands into the ground, fastening himself down so he wouldn't thrash about or writhe. _Let Ichigo hurt you_, Renji told himself. _You deserve it. You're scum. The one you love should hurt you_. Renji felt his eyes begin to water and cursed himself. A crimson haze blurred his vision, his blood beat in his ears and he felt faint. _Don't you dare pass out_, Renji ordered himself.

Ichigo's movements became more erratic, and as he felt a swell of immense inclination he spent himself inside Renji. The boy caught his breath and collapsed next to the redhead, whose face was crumpled with agony underneath his large hand. Ichigo watched Renji's chest rise and fall quickly. He noticed a drop of sweat running down the man's temple and into his crimson hair. The boy reached to wipe it away, and realized it was cold and dripping from the corner of the man's eye. Ichigo's face twisted slightly in confusion. He lifted the man's hand off his face, "Renji?"

Renji opened his eyes slowly and gazed at Ichigo.

"Renji?" Ichigo asked curiously, uneasiness creeping up in him. It looked as if the man hand been crying. "…What's wrong?"

"I'm fine," Renji answered thickly. He tried to smile. "Nothing's wrong." Renji traced Ichigo's lower lip with his thumb. The boy nodded and went to gather his clothes. Renji struggled to sit up. He nabbed his discarded clothing and carefully slid into them. He winced as he stood. Excruciating bolts of pain surged through him as he walked, but he went forward anyway. There was comfort in this pain- comfort because it was from Ichigo. And if he could shoulder this pain, he could live with himself. That's what he believed.

"Renji," Ichigo came up from behind and wrapped his arms around the man. "About before," the boy wore a blushing scowl, "I'm sor- like, I don't blame you. Alright? I get that you weren't, uh, in your right mind so-"

"-I told you already Ichigo," Renji peeled Ichigo's arms away, "not to be so careful with me." Renji shut his eyes, _don't apologize to me, Ichigo; I just couldn't stand it._

"I don't understand," Ichigo murmured before rushing past the man. Renji watched as Ichigo ran into the house. He kinda hoped that the kid would have helped him walk there.

…

Ichigo threw the door open and paused when he saw Yoruichi and Kisuke casually playing cards by the window. "Oh, hey there Ichigo." Kisuke greeted innocently. "You look winded. You should rest." Yoruichi nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, I will. I'll be in the next room." Ichigo started toward the room. "I'm really tired. So could not disturb me? I want to get to bed early."

"Yes, of course! Have a good rest, Ichigo!" Yoruichi gleamed and Ichigo disappeared. Kisuke gave Yoruichi a thumbs up and she winked back.

Renji could be heard approaching the doorway minutes later, but it was a few moments longer until he actually entered the house. His gaze fell onto Yoruichi and Kisuke casually playing cards by the window.

"Oh, hey there Renji." Kisuke greeted innocently. "You look winded. You should rest." Yoruichi nodded in agreement once again.

Renji eyed them and then the window. "Were you watching _that_?" he asked pointing to the window. Yoruichi and Kisuke exchanged looks.

"Dammit," they muttered and nodded guiltily.

Renji waved a dismissive hand, "Ah, whatever." He stopped himself from grinning and then pointed to the entrance of the next room. Kisuke nodded.

"Resting," Yoruichi said quietly. "So he said."

Renji muttered something about brooding and then turned his attention to Yoruichi and Kisuke. "You two find a way out of here?"

"We have some ideas," Kisuke said unsmiling.

"Look," Renji began rubbing his head nervously. "The gates of hell don't just open up upon request… So I'm guessing you three snuck in through the spirit halls? You ain't got no _hell butterflies_ with you, but… I suppose it wouldn't be impossible."

"Don't strain yourself trying to figure out the details, Ren," Yoruichi tittered. "They aren't important." Renji frowned. "Just hang in there. We only need a few more days be-"

"-That won't work. I know what you're planning, but," Renji's frown deepened. "You can't force the gates open, and there is no way around them. Hell is not the Seireitei; it was designed to _keep_ spirits inside."

Yoruichi and Kisuke grew silent.

"If you want out," Renji grinned. "You've got to _shake hands with the devil_, literally."

"What are you saying Renji?" Yoruichi asked quietly.

"We've got to cut a deal with _God_," Kisuke answered suddenly. "That's what he's saying, but I don't like the idea."

Renji shrugged. "Then try to tear a hole in the sky. It won't work. Haven't you noticed? There isn't any spiritual pressure here. And if there isn't, how well you manipulate it into opening up a spiritual passageway? No. There is no escaping hell."

………………………………………………………………………………………………...

**Hello! Thank you for reading this far! & Thank you to everyone who has reviewed! I dig the support!**

**Please stick around for the conclusion of this story! It'll be up very soon (if it isn't already up by now!) I promise there's something quite interesting that'll happen! **

**Thank you so much! **


	4. Conclusion

**BLEACH: HOUSE BUILT ON SAND; SEQUEL TO A LINE IN THE SAND**

Renji sat outside, leaning against the wooden home. He felt a great discomfort in sitting, but it wasn't like any other positions were more comfortable. He could hear the two ex-shinigami bickering inside about strategy. He tried to think about how to proceed as well, but found it impossible to concentrate. His mind could only scream, and it screamed for an awful liberation.

His body shivered in response, aching and pleading for the maintenance of his chronic habit. A wave of nausea pulsed through him, urging him to rid his stomach of its empty contents. Renji held his head. He felt as if his skull was wired with volts of electrical energy, which snapped and beat at his temples. Relief. He needed relief.

He grabbed onto his throbbing forearm. _I won't give in_, Renji yelled to himself. _I won't. I won't. I won't_. He had repeated himself until he forgotten his original intent altogether. And all that remained was that terrible craving- his sickening dependence.

Renji shot a desperate glance to his scarred forearm. The source. This was the source of his misery. His enemy. His own arm had turned against him. Renji's mind ran wild. "Stop taunting me," he mumbled to his arm. Renji stared hard at it. He could have sworn that the pinkish flecks of scar tissue resembled a face. He could see it. Two eyes and a hideous, wide smile… and it was _laughing_ at him. It was staring back at him with conquest. Renji dug his nails into its perverse face. "Don't think you've won anything," he hissed. He broke the skin, and grinned when blood bubbled over the gouges. Curling his fingers into the tissue, he uprooted a blue vein. Ha! He'd won. The face was gone, hidden under its own gore. Then to be thorough, Renji began to peel its skin away.

And so he sat, happy and victorious, grabbing fleshy edges of skin and ripping them away slowly in strips from his forearm. It was a bloody, but glorious battle.

…

"Fucking Christ!!" It was Yoruichi's voice that screamed. It's shrill and terror fluttering into the wooden home, alarming the two other men. Their quick footsteps hurried outside to join her. Ichigo paused behind her, his line of vision joining hers. It felt unreal. Surely, this wasn't actually happening. It was a sick joke at best.

Ichigo's stomach convulsed and he crumpled over. The sour taste of bile still pooled in his mouth as he straightened and looked again onto the sickening parody.

No. This couldn't be real, but it was. This _is_ happening. This _is_ real. Ichigo's attempts to convince himself otherwise proved futile as his vision faded and he hit the ground. He lied unconscious, only a few feet away from Renji, whose still body leaned bloody against the house.

…

Light crept into Ichigo's eyes. Upon awaking, he found himself propped in a bolstered chair. His mind raced, flooding with memories. _Renji_. He threw himself about the room. It was empty, but he heard voices in the next. He ripped the screen door open. "Renji!" he screamed as tears rolled down from his devastated eyes. Two arms grabbed him. Kisuke Urahara.

"Ichigo stop!" the exile yelled. "Get a hold of yourself!" Ichigo thrashed about for a few more seconds before regaining his wits. He stood breathing hard.

"Who's that?" he heard a weak voice questioning. Ichigo scoured the room and saw Yoruichi, sitting on her knees, adjusting an IV that was fixed in Renji's undamaged arm. Renji was lying on his back, on top of a few piled futons. "Ichigo?" the man huffed. "Ichigo is that you?"

Kisuke waited for Yoruichi's permission before he unhanded Ichigo. The boy hurried to Renji's side.

"Yeah, Renji," Ichigo called to him in a quieted panic. "It's me. I'm here. I'm here now." He cursed the moment he ever left the man's side. Ichigo took Renji's relaxed hand into his own. "How is he?" he asked Yoruichi, his eyes still glued on the man.

Yoruichi hesitated. "His injuries… will heal, but he's…" Yoruichi eye's flooded with sympathy, "…he's very sick, Ichigo."

Renji cracked a smile, looking straight into Ichigo's wet eyes. "Ichigo, hey. Are we going now? You're not going to leave are you?" Renji formed his words carefully, voicing them calmly as his mind calculated; Ichigo might be useful.

"No," Ichigo cried a little harder. "No, I'm not going anywhere."

"But I _need_ you to go somewhere. Won't you go somewhere for me?"

"What?" Ichigo searched Renji's desperate eyes. Yoruichi grew anxious and looked over to Kisuke, who was frowning. "Renji, what're you talking about?"

"Heh," Renji's mouth spread into a crooked grin. "You remember my place, don't you? Back at the den? You remember, right?"

"Yes, I remember."

Renji bit into his lower lip with excitement. "And the low table by the futon, you remember that too, right?" Ichigo nodded. Renji's smile widened. "In the top drawer-"

"-Renji, that's enough," came Yoruichi's hard voice. Renji's eyes darted onto the woman and then back onto Ichigo.

"Ichigo," Renji's smile quivered. "Please, in the top drawer there's a black case," Renji began to speak quicker, his grip tightened around Ichigo's hand. "Take it. Bring it here. You'll get this for me, won't you? Ichigo? Won't you?"

"Renji!" Yoruichi's voice boomed like a goddess. "Just stop."

Ichigo's mouth shook and tears stained his distraught face. "Renji, I can't."

"Ichigo!" Renji flared. Renji reached and grabbed the boy's shoulders. He sat up and the IV tugged at his arm. "You have to get this for me! Please! I'll do anything! I need it! Ichigo!"

The boy froze. "No," he said weakly.

Renji snarled and began to yell. Ichigo backed away. He was afraid- truly afraid, and of Renji. Yoruichi set herself between them. She pushed Renji back onto the futons and the man screamed more. Ichigo could hear his heart beating. It was too much. It was too real. He felt someone drag him to his feet. It was Kisuke. The exile guided Ichigo to the door and encouraged him to leave. "You don't need to see this," Kisuke said.

"Don't touch me! Stop it! Get away!" Renji's shouts filled the room and Yoruichi struggled to restrain him. "Ichigo!" The boy swallowed and left the room; his legs moved on their own, working like a machine. Behind him he could still hear Renji shouting at Yoruichi. "You bitch! I'll kill you! Do you hear me? I'll fucking rip you apart if you let me live! You're dead!" Ichigo walked out of the house so he wouldn't be able to hear any more of it.

…

Thirty hours past. Ichigo didn't move much. He sat in that same bolstered chair, rising only to pace. He couldn't eat and there was nothing to eat anyway. Kisuke sat cross-legged on the floor opposite him. It had been raining earlier; pooled water was dripping through the thatched roof and onto the floor. Ichigo listened to its constant drumming.

Yoruichi sauntered into the room, closing the screen behind her. She had made it clear that Ichigo was not to approach Renji again until more time had passed. She continued forward and sat next to Kisuke. No one spoke. The water dripped.

How long? How much longer would this go on? Ichigo kept to himself. What was there to say? There was nothing he could do- only things he _should_ have done.

"Ichigo." It was Yoruichi who whispered. The water dripped. "It's been almost a week since you entered this place. We'd understand if you decided you wanted to leave. I'll take care of things here. If you want to begin finding a way out-"

"No," Ichigo answered quietly, shaking his head. "How could I?" The boy gave a weak smile and Yoruichi nodded.

"So be it." Yoruichi rose and rested her slight palm on Ichigo's shoulder. "He'll get better and he'll be the same man he was before. Just a few more days and it'll be out of his system." Ichigo swallowed and nodded. The water dripped. "Ichigo. Will you forgive him?"

The water dripped until morning.

…

Yoruichi allowed Ichigo to see Renji that evening. He slipped through the screen door and hesitated before continuing forward. He found Renji lying on his back, black ties restraining his limbs; although, the man didn't look well enough to fight against them. Ichigo walked closer so that Renji could see him, but the man was staring blankly at the ceiling. Ichigo noticed Renji's mouth moving silently- he was counting.

"Thirty, forty, fifty," the man counted on. Ichigo touched his face and directed it away from the ceiling. Renji's eyes rolled onto Ichigo, then slid back to the ceiling.

"What are you counting?" Ichigo mumbled quietly, unable to see anything on the ceiling. _What does he see_? Renji's mouth stopped moving, but it still hung open slightly; his distracted eyes stared motionlessly forward.

Ichigo sat next to the man's futon and raked his fingers through his crimson locks. They were both silent. Ichigo worked the man's hair into tiny braids. Hours past and Ichigo's hands cramped up. Never once in that time did Renji speak and never once did he look at Ichigo. He was lost and shattered. Everything had broken around him.

Ichigo studied Renji's face. It was unfocused and dazed, but still beautiful. Death hung about the man's eyes, and a deep sadness plagued them; but Ichigo still thought he was beautiful. He leaned over Renji's chest, "I'll _always_ forgive you," he said.

…

Ichigo slept until the afternoon. Yoruichi told him that it'd be best if he'd skip visiting with Renji today; apparently, the man was feverish and slipping in and out of consciousness. Ichigo consented and busied himself by conversing with Kisuke. "Ah, Yoruichi hasn't been paying attention to me lately," the exile pouted.

"Well," Ichigo responded.

"…You know," Kisuke grinned. "You chose a pretty difficult relationship to pursue yourself."

Ichigo's eyes grew wide. "Wh-what?" he stuttered, blushing.

"Renji Abarai has always been, well, a bit rough around the edges." The exile laughed remembering, "He's always driven Rukia up the wall and I'd daresay Byakuya as well." His eyes grew serious behind his cheerful grin. "You're bound for heartbreak, Ichigo."

"I know," he answered, not meeting Kisuke's eyes.

That night Ichigo slept poorly. He woke in the early morning and for once, was grateful for his persistent insomnia. God knows, if he hadn't been able to sleep, he might not have noticed Renji's absence.

The shoji screen was pulled open and the room was empty behind it. Ichigo cursed and silently dashed out the house. As he exited the doorway into the outdoors, someone caught his wrist. It was Renji.

_He must have been waiting outside the doorway. Was he waiting for me?_ Ichigo thought. "Ren-Renji?"

Renji only smiled and tugged on Ichigo's arm, motioning for him to follow. Ichigo's legs trailed behind him obediently. Neither spoke a word until they were out of earshot from the ex-shinigami. Renji halted and faced Ichigo with a gentle smile.

"Renji… where are you taking me?"

"Back home."

"What?"

Renji sighed. "You're going back to your world, _now_."

"No, wait. What about Yoruichi and Kisuke?"

"They go later."

"What? Renji, you're not making any sense!" Ichigo tore his hand from the man's grip. "Please! Just explain to me!"

Renji let out another sigh. "You're such a strange kid," he said, tracing Ichigo's jaw with his hand.

"Stop it." Ichigo turned his head away from the man's touch. "This is wrong."

"Is it?" Renji turned his gaze away. "I want you to go back home," he extended his palm to Ichigo. "Come on."

"We'll all go back… together. Yoruichi, Kisuke and you too Renji- We'll all go home."

"Home," a laugh caught in Renji's throat. "Don't gimme that crap." He pointed at Ichigo, "You belong in the human world. You're going back _now_. So get ov-"

"No!"

Renji grumbled. "This is what I get for starting a relationship with a teenager," Renji mumbled as he hoisted Ichigo over his shoulder.

"Hey! Renji! What the fuck?! Let me down!" the boy pounded on Renji's back. Rage caused Ichigo's face to flush. "Idiot! This is why people call you loutish!"

Renji laughed, "People say that?"

"Renji! Seriously! Put me down- ah!" Ichigo winced when he hit the ground. "Bastard! Did you have to drop me so suddenly?!"

Renji crouched to Ichigo's eye level, "Why? Do you like when I hold you?" Blood rushed into Ichigo's speechless face. A sudden, throaty laugh erupted from Renji. "You're hilarious."

"Wha- Fuck you!" Ichigo jumped onto his feet. "I hate this, Renji!" he yelled suddenly, speaking and not really knowing why. Why'd he half to voice _these_ feelings? He wasn't even sure where they were coming from. "You're always just fucking with me! I can't stand it! What am I to you?!" Renji stood in shock as Ichigo continued, "Am I your little toy? Well? Am I just some sort of amusing hobby? You're sick! You're sick! Do you hear me?! Sick!"

"Hey! I don't think of you like that so sh-!"

"-I don't want to hear it! Everything you do or say is just like a sick game! How can you treat people like this?! Like they're just some plaything?! How can you _live_ with yourself?!" Renji stood quiet. Ichigo panicked. _No! No! That's not what I wanted to say! I don't really feel like that! What am I doing?! What did I say!_ Ichigo stared desperately at Renji_. Why won't he say anything?!_

"I…" Renji's voice cracked and he fell silent. He just wanted to be _good_. He wanted to be _so_ good to Ichigo, but he'd done everything wrong. Ichigo's words echoed in his head: _"How can you live with yourself?!"_

"Renji," Ichigo called anxiously. "I didn't mean…" _Damn it! I'm such an idiot!_

"I handled you all wrong," Renji said abruptly. "I know that." Renji gripped Ichigo's arm and pulled the boy into him. "But _this_ is real to me," he said releasing Ichigo's arm and bringing his hand behind the boy's neck. "You're the only thing right in my life. I could never think of you as a game." Renji pressed his forehead onto Ichigo's. "Fuck- I love you too much." He brought his mouth onto Ichigo's and kissed him ardently.

Ichigo felt desire stir in him. He didn't want Renji to stop. He wanted to feel the man's touch wandering on his body. He wanted to feel Renji's lips trail lower. He wanted, oh, he wanted! His skin burned with desire, his flesh remembering the sensations of all their previous encounters. "Renji," Ichigo moaned into the man's mouth. Renji pulled his lips away and looked at Ichigo. "You said… you _love_ me?"

"I don't know what else to do with you," Renji answered, his mouth curved into a smile.

"I'm so scared," Ichigo cried, burying his face into Renji's shirt, "to lose you. With all the fucking shit you do," Ichigo thought of the man's suicide and drug abuse. He thought of what had happened only a few days ago; he remembered the look of Renji's limp and bloodied body leaning against the house. He remembered the man's arm, raw and destroyed by its own partner. "I'm so scared that I'll wake up and you'll be gone for good."

Renji hugged the boy tightly. A moment of silence passed. "Sorry. I just don't… know how else to deal with things," he said slowly. "I know, I'm a fucking moron. I know."

"You are. You're a real fucking moron!"

"I know."

"You fucking moron!"

"I know."

Ichigo grabbed onto Renji's waist. "You make me fucking nuts. You know that?" Renji nodded. Ichigo swallowed, _but how could I live without you? I couldn't_. _When you… died. When you went to hell, I was such a mess_. Ichigo laughed with his thoughts. "When you were gone, it was unbearable. And I would rather live in this hell, then be without you, because nothing is worse than that."

"Ichigo…?"

"So what I'm trying to say is," Ichigo stumbled over the words. "I just- I mean- Fuck! I guess I love you too, Renji!"

"Geez."

…

Renji and Ichigo stood sheepishly in the doorway. "Wake the fuck up!" Renji boomed, his demand waking Yoruichi and Kisuke. "This kid ain't leaving without you. So get yer asses up."

"What? Renji? Renji! What are you doing walking around?" Yoruichi yelled to him. "You shouldn't be up! I had-"

"Yeah, I was bound up like a crazy person, I know. Shut up. Let's go."

"Renji," Ichigo sounded shocked. He hadn't expected the man to act so rudely, especially not to Yoruichi.

Renji breathed deeply. _Why am I so irritated?_ _I've got to calm down._ Renji tried to focus himself. He knew what his problem was. His body was still hooked and experiencing the last strands of withdrawal. His mind was still screaming. He needed a fix- needed it badly. He shook it away. "Come on. We've got to get going."

"And where well you take us Assistant Captain Abarai? I'm rather curious." It was Kisuke's coy voice that spoke.

"To _God_. You want to get home, don't you? You've got to live out your ostracism in the place where you were sentenced to meet it." Renji grinned. "And I'm sick of this place. The air here doesn't suit me."

"No, I suppose it doesn't." Kisuke answered flatly.

"You're sure you know the way?" Yoruichi asked Renji carefully.

"Of course. I've been there before."

Ichigo squirmed next to Renji. Something wasn't adding up. They'd had this conversation before. The boy began to feel uneasy all over again. He noticed that Yoruichi and Kisuke looked doubtful.

Renji looked onto Ichigo. He could feel the boy's reluctance, could see it on his face. _Ichigo, your onto me already, eh?_ Renji smiled sadly to himself. This needed to be done. He'd get these three back into the human world, but he had no intention of returning with them. He knew very well that this was where his life and Ichigo's would part. Renji would be the one to strike the _deal_ with _God_. It would be his sacrifice, his gift, to Ichigo. This would be how he made right on everything. He only hoped that Ichigo wouldn't figure out his intentions too early. He squeezed onto boy's hand, and Ichigo looked up at him with worry. _I'm no good for you Ichigo_, Renji reminded himself. _I tried to be, fuck, I tried!_

Renji clenched his jaw shut. Would this be one of their last moments together? He didn't want it to be. _Let him go,_ Renji told himself again. _You're a damned man, and Ichigo's got a life outside this place. It's not fair to hold him back_.

It hurt. In the end, Renji would always be a stray dog and it hurt to know it. He cursed himself. "Well, come on then," Renji added dryly. "Let's go _home_."

………………………………………………………………………………………………

**Well that's it! I hoped you liked the conclusion of HOUSE BUILT ON SAND! I also hope it wasn't too confusing or hard to follow! Thank you to those who reviewed for your support! Thank you so much!**

…

**I had trouble writing the mushy "I love you" scene, but I enjoyed writing Renji's craziness!**

**Thanks again for reading! If you'd like, please review! **

**I'd love your feedback- good or bad! **


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